My dog’s party days are over. Here’s why.
My dog got stoned today. She binged on pot gummies and zig-zagged across our yard like a drunken sailor. It would have been funny, if it wasn’t terrifying.
Hachi is a 40-pound Nova Scotia Duck Trolling Retriever. She’s a big dog, with a big personality – and she’s the heart of our family. My kids taunt her like bullies, and she still wears two crowns, one as their guardian and one as their playmate.
The gummies were zipped up tight in my wife’s travel bag, tucked away in a closet where we knew our kids wouldn’t find them. But we forgot about the wonder that is a dog’s sense of smell, the 300,000,000 nasal receptor cells that allow them to zone in on the tiniest treats.
She started to act, well, weird. Wavering, falling, walking into walls. Then she started acting, well, more weird. She couldn’t fetch the ball that was sitting next to her. She threw up. She peed.
So I did exactly what you’re not supposed to do: I consulted Dr. Google. His answers ranged from “oh she’ll just be dizzy” to “she now has the bubonic plague”. And in the time it took me to waver repeatedly between fear and relief, the pot wore off and Hachi became normal again.
If I had done what I was supposed to do, swallowed my pride and called her vet, I would have learned that marijuana affects dogs in different ways, depending on their size and how much they consumed. I would have learned that, while usually harmless, pot can be life-threatening for a dog. I would have learned that, in the past 6 years, the Pet Poison Hotline has seen a 448% increase in marijuana cases, with the majority involving pets eating laced food products. You know, like gummies. In your wife’s travel bag.
Instead, I learned a few other lessons:
- My dog’s party days are over.
When Hatchi “came to”, she was tired and covered in pee. It took her a full day to bounce back. So she’s living sober from now on.
- This could have been my kids.
No matter how well-hidden our bag was, kids are just plain curious. And gummies are just plain delicious.
- A bag lock is a must
Being a cannabis connoisseur comes with a heightened sense of responsibility, and we now keep our products up high and locked up tight.
There are plenty of cannabis storage options out there, but few offer the peace of mind that Rob Rodney does. The lock may seem like such a small thing, but in the end, it’s the biggest thing: the safety of our family.